When life happens to a small business owner: Strategies to Cope

It is extremely challenging to run a business and it's made even more challenging when life strikes three people who contract to you all in the span of a few days.

Three of the people who contract to my business found themselves with life changing issues before them causing one to have to move and take herself right out of the equation.  Juggling and rebalancing workloads still hasn't fully taken place, and I have been struggling under the work load, although as I review and ditch stuff, it is getting more manageable again.

Then add a surgery into the mix and a personal life where in I have had 6 friends die, and 3 children of friends commit suicide. It's been a rough 9 weeks.

Then there are all of the political minefields that cause so much emotional upheaval.
It's tough now a days trying to figure out the truth.

Depending on what media outlet you listen to, depending on your personal values, ideals and politics, there are a lot of issues that are driving a lot of people, myself included, around the bend.

I am struggling emotionally. And the struggle is very real.

While I understand that nothing in life is certain except death, taxes and change, I am not a terribly happy woman with a lot of the changes I see. Our veterans are told that they ask too much when they ask for the supports they need to survive and thrive, and yet, we welcome all sorts of people into our country ILLEGALLY and because there is no well thought out plan to deal with the sheer volumes of people we are opening our borders to, well there is financial burden and hardship placed on the provinces.  Quebec billed the federal government for $146 M to deal with illegal border crossings, Ontario $200 M.

We bail out the media industry with $585 million dollars over 5 years, but we can't give our veterans the care they deserve.  In just these three issues the feds have spent 1 billion dollars.

Here in Alberta our oil patch is land locked but instead of building refineries and selling our own gas, we are flogging the dead horse of pipeline and rail cars. It disgusts me frankly.

The world wide political scene is like watching a bad B movie that you can't get away from.
I have been working at refocusing myself in an attempt to reduce the stress I feel.

Here are a few of the things I am doing:

Meditation: I had gotten away from doing that, I am unclear as to why, but I find it calms my mind.

Doing this again, is helping at least for a while every day.

Exercise: I am doing light work outs up to twice a day.  The minute I feel the electrical charges building up in my body, you know the ones, those prickly little beggars that make you feel uptight, anxious and angry....I get on my whole body massager and crack out the 5 pound weights for ten minutes.  Often I plug in the earphones and listen to ten minutes of positive affirmations.

I am taking vitamins B & D, and amino acids L-Theanine and L-Tyrosine for mood.

Sleep: I have been going to bed at 7:30-8:00 PM every night. Getting up around 4:00-4:30 AM.

Eating: I have been working at eliminating sugar from my diet - that's been tough, but I am down significantly and that seems to help. I am also working at losing weight, from having quit smoking.
I had gained about 60 pounds, and am down by 35 or so. I plateaued for a bit, but finally I seem to be loosing a little again and if nothing else I am toning up nicely.

Socializing: It's not something I have ever had a lot of time to do, but I am having to trim what little I have been doing down to all but none. I go out for lunch with select people who I know don't stress me out by talking about things that are upsetting.

Ditching/Changing social media: There's the big one for me.

I used to love debating politics and political view points, but that was back in the day, about 10 years ago, before everyone forgot how to speak civilly to each other.

I was part of the debate team in high school and we were taught how not to take anything personally. but back then, no one called you a mindless minion or a stupid F'in C%$& for your opinions or ideals. I find that it's hard to take comments like that as anything but personal, but I am working on it.

Still, I don't want to associate with people who are going to treat others that way and so, I have blocked so many people in the last while that it became exhausting and I decided for my own mental health to just opt out for a while.

That break did me good.

The unintended but positive consequences of blocking so many who are hurtful in their dialogue?
I find is that my newsfeeds are filling up with funny videos of animals doing quirky things and that change has been welcome. I am learning to laugh a little again!

I am on LinkedIn a lot more these days and am enjoying a far more divergent group of people and topics.

So tell me, how do you manage the stress of life and being in business?

On Monday I will be writing on the topic of reducing the stress during the Holiday Season - Thanksgiving, through to New years Eve....
AND we have the MOST AMAZING gift guide going and I will unveil it on Monday too!

Until then, if you are blessed to live in a warm climate where you can ride a motorcycle, please remember to ride like everyone around you is blind and can not see you , and put a few extra miles on for please.

Belt Drive Betty,
Editor & Rider

Big Changes to the IOMC in Edmonton

I was recently contacted by the former International Nomad of the Snow City Crew of the IOMC in Edmonton to let me know about some rather large changes that have taken place.

Cheezy had this to say...

Very recently the following members have stepped away (out in good-OIG) from the club:

1. Cheezy - Intl. Nomad, Canada
2. Uke - Chapter Prez.
3. Hula - VP
4. D-Ball - Biz. Manager
5. Kanga - full patch
6.Mahigan - full patch
7. Klink - Intl. Nomad - USA resident

You probably recognize some names from this list as being long term members (relatively speaking) and certainly original founding members for the Edmonton chapter.

So why did we all leave? 

Was the problem other clubs? 

Was the problem that the 1%ers finally said enough?.......NO.

Like most things in life, as you grow and develop any organization/club a few seem to influence others into a direction that the originals don't agree with. 

This has happened with our group.

New leadership at the international club level has effected so many at the chapter level, to the point that many of us "chapter originals" that you got to know and respect, could no longer wear the IOMC patch on our backs.

The club and our chapter have changed big time. 

Let me say this.....although the club never "asked permission" there were many of us who respected the hierarchy of the club world and gave respect to those in the 1% clubs. 

It was simple really......we stayed out of their club business and minded our own business. Period. 

We NEVER EVER looked for trouble or hid behind a badge. 

The Edmonton chapter, when we were a part of it, never had an LE member.

These principles will still be followed and respected by all of us who have moved on.

It took us three years to build our chapter up, and during that time we made life long friends with our core group. I'm not sure what we will be called going forward, if anything. 

But I can assure you that I personally, will NEVER wear a three price patch again. 

I wish those remaining in the IOMC Edmonton chapter all the luck in the world because with the changes that have taken place, I think they're going to need it. 

So where do we go from here? 

For the most part, the men who have left are very close and remain a very tight brotherhood. 

I don't see that changing anytime soon. 

I hope you realize that the men you've come to know are the same honourable men we have always been. 

We remain proud motorcycle enthusiasts and have nothing to prove to anyone. 

We continue to ride and enjoy each other's company as we do so. 

Our wives and girlfriends have also become very close to each other and continue on in their friendships.

And for we Edmonton chapter originals, that's more than enough.

Cheesy, former International Nomad for the IOMC 

(Now a happy carefree rider)

So there you have it folks. 

The IOMC in Edmonton has changed in a direction that many did not agree with and so those members that I got to know and respect are now just normal riding citizens.

What will the change in the direction of the IOMC mean to the Edmonton riding and 1% communities? No one knows for sure at the moment.  

The only thing we can do now is to watch, wait and pray that the American style of hatred doesn't generate some kind of turf war here.

On a personal level, I am happy that these men who have become valued friends are no longer with the IOMC - I am glad my instincts about the quality of their character was bang on and that they have moved on to different pursuits. I always feared for their safety any time the rode in the US with that patch on their back.  Now I can breath a sigh of relief that they no longer have that target on their back.

If you are blessed enough to be riding today, please remember to ride like everyone around you is blind and cannot see you.

Belt Drive Betty,

Editor & Rider

PTSD - A Growing Conversation

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder: is a mental health condition that's triggered by a terrifying event — either experiencing it or witnessing it. Symptoms may include flashbacks, nightmares and severe anxiety, as well as uncontrollable thoughts about the event. (Mayo Clinic)

Kate MacEachern, a former Corporal in the Canadian Armed Forces is on a mission.

Walking from Nipawin Saskatchewan to Chilliwack BC, Kate's journey is all about creating dialogue around PTSD, it's causes, it's side effects and the solutions that can bring a measure of happiness, joy and sunshine back into people's lives.

The 45 pound rucksack she carries on her back is symbolic of the burden of PTSD that so many first responders, service personnel and veteran's carry.

The journey through PTSD is all about learning to live with a new normal.

My story:

Like everyone out there, I have a few causes that are close to my heart. Finding a cure for MS - my wonderful husband has MS, so, it's important to me that we find a cure, anything to do with children who are suffering from sexual, physical and psychological abuse. As a survivor, those causes are important to me. PTSD; being a survivor, having dealt with psychiatrists and doctors, insurance and bureaucracy, I know all too well about the stigma involved with PTSD.

PTSD almost robbed me of my life. I had survived repeated beatings at the hand of my mother, I had survived being sexually molested, I had survived the car crash that put me in braces, physically, but inside, my spirit, my soul and mind were struggling. Nightmares, cold sweats, very little sleep for days and weeks and months and years...mood swings, sometimes violent ones...along with a host of other unpleasant symptoms. 

After several medications that did not work (Wellbutrin, Zoloft etc) the drugs the doctors eventually put me on, Paxil and Amitriptyline ended up exacerbating the problem instead of alleviating it.  No one knew at the time, that you should not drink coffee on Paxil. Here I was, 2-3 pots of coffee a day on 40MG's of this stuff and low and behold, when they adjusted the Amtrityline the last time, it triggered suicidal thoughts. After about a week of not being able to shut the voice off in my head, feeling like I couldn't tell anyone what was going on, terrified of what the outcome would be, I checked myself into the hospital. I spent two weeks being weened off of caffeine, through tests, it was discovered I had caffeine toxicity and 75% liver damage caused by the combination of coffee and Paxil.

I went through hell. My family went through it with me. Counselling helped some, but none of the drugs the doctors tried on me worked and with the last set almost killing me I decided I would pitch the drugs and find other ways to deal with my challenges. I meditate now, watch my diet, use herbal supplements, read a lot of spiritual books. Riding my motorcycle helps me cope as does snuggling with my cats...but...

It wasn't until I went to Wounded Warriors Weekend in Slave Lake AB last August that I truly, deeply got the message that I wasn't alone, I wasn't weird, I was wounded.

Being surrounded by others who had similar sleeping patterns to mine, watching others trigger, listening to the experiences of others who like me, wanted to do more than just survive...it wasn't until that weekend that I felt accepted, by ME. I had bought into the stigma that the doctors, friends and strangers had labelled me with. I was ashamed of me and this weakness.  NO MORE.

At Wounded Warriors Weekend I found a new layer to my healing.

DIALOGUE.

I feel stronger inside than I have in years, and I believe that the simple act of dialogue brought an enlightenment an understanding to my brain that it had not been able to accept before.

Although I wasn't a soldier or a veteran, I wasn't a cop or a fire fighter, not a medic either, the people who attended Wounded Warriors Weekend, made me realize that my trauma's while different from theirs, were real, horrible and that I wasn't crazy.

I was more like them than not, I was simply trying to find a new normal while resenting loosing the old normal.

One of the people who touched my soul and helped rekindle my fire and passion for life, was Kate MacEachern. Having been thrown from a horse during a training exercise with the Lord Strathcona's Mounted Regiment, this woman, whose back was broken, who later experienced a stroke because of a dislodged blood clot caused by the horse incident, a woman who was told she'd never walk again, might never function fully again, helped me.

She helped me through her compassion, her empathy, her courage, strength and inner beauty.

Kate MacEachern is all of those things and so much more.

After interviewing her, spending time with her, I vowed that I wanted to do more surrounding the issue of PTSD.

I wanted to support our Warriors, those who do jobs that horrify, that destroy the soul, the body and the mind. The Police, Medics, Fire Fighters, Soldiers, Veteran's - these people do jobs that I am not sure I would have the courage to do. They see horrific car wrecks, people burning alive, children being abused, bullets and IED's taking the lives of their friends - they see the WORST of humanity & Mother Nature and yet they rush in to help instead of pulling back.

Because of meeting Kate, I decided to start an event that will become it's own association in time, called Wheels for Our Wounded using my non profit, The Canadian Motorcycle Tourism Association to do so.

The goal; to help those who need wind therapy to deal with their PTSD be able to have motorcycles converted with side cars or made into trikes, help buy wheel chair accessible vehicles or help get vehicles modified so a Warrior could drive their car or truck.

You see the government looks upon private vehicles as a luxury, but those of us who ride, know that a motorcycle is far more than a luxury, for some of us, it's a life line. Those who can't take public transit know that wheels mean freedom, independence and dignity.

Dog therapy, equine therapy, wind therapy, gardening therapy - there are almost as many PTSD therapy types as there are sufferers.  This is not a one size fits all illness. There are organizations funding many of the different therapies, but vehicle therapy outside of wheel chair accessible vehicles isn't being funded here in Canada.

I called Kate and asked her if she could be my special guest since she'd be in Edmonton for May 30th - told her I'd donate 25% of everything we take in to her cause and the balance would go to purchasing a motorcycle for a veteran in need of motorcycle therapy. She agreed.

AND THEN I was asked to join the team of The Long Way Home as Operations Manager.
Overwhelmed but excited to be involved in making a bigger difference, I readily agreed.

Though we are only two weeks into Kate's 3 month long journey, I can't tell you how healing this experience has been. Gruelling, challenging but healing, for all of us in the team I do believe.

As her ops manager, my job is to take care of all the little things that crop up while the team is on the road. I apply for permits, coordinate with the rest of the team like Cindy Murphy the publicist, the events team, Pat Varga, Brenda Fredercikson, Drea Popiel, David Wilson, Sophie Pyne and Paula DeLorey her medic and all of the communities and people who reach out wanting to be involved.
I help with social media, the web site, designing and ordering of swag, ensuring the team knows what is happening from day to day. It's busy work.

The on road team is comprised of 5 women, three who are survivors with PTSD, 4 horses and one pre teen boy.

Kate is joined for the first 30 days of this trip by her son, Tyler. His message is almost as powerful as that of his mother. After all he lives with PTSD as much as she does.

For much of this journey Kate will be walking with two horses and their riders, Rebecca and her daughter Emily; Emily has PTSD. The N.A.S.H. Project provides service dogs and therapy horses and is headed up by Rebecca and her daughter.

As beneficiaries of Kate's efforts, they wanted to join Kate and show the people they get to meet what great therapy a horse can be, to talk about the effects of a service dog on its handler, to provide hope and help the discussions focus on HOPE, on supports.

Kate, Tyler, Rebecca, Emily, Lisa and JoAnne  with the Fire Fighters of
Britannia Wilton Fire Dept near Lloydminster SK/AB

I have been volunteering a ton of my time to this walk, this cause, this woman and the team on the road and yet...I feel like I have been given far more than I have been able to give to them.

To read the stories of how Kate and her team's message have touched people's lives, to see the photos and the joy, the hope she is spreading - the dialogue that is being created.

To play witness to the to the monster determination that is Kate MacEachern fills me in a way I can't truly describe.

This is her third and final journey.

It will be the most gruelling of them all, it is truly THE LONG WAY HOME.

PLEASE Follow Kate Mac, The Long Way Home and the N.A.S.H. Project. There are SOOOO many ways you can support this woman and her team as they make their way to Chilliwack.

You can:

1. Join an event in a community near you.
2. Be out on the highway and walk a kilometre or two with her.
3. Donate a few dollars, buy a tee shirt or a pin through her online store. 
4. Join her Free shopping circle.

Follow her on Facebook and Twitter, visit her site often - show this woman and this team that PTSD IS NO LONGER a DIRTY LITTLE SECRET - engage, talk share.

The more dialogue that is created, the more support will be offered to those working at reclaiming their lives and learning to live within a new normal.

Thanks for hearing me out folks and PLEASE - GET INVOLVED - BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE....

Belt Drive Betty
Editor & Rider



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